First Two Weeks of Intersquad Sevens Shows Promise for Coming Months (Week 2)

John Palladino making a Scrumhalf-tastic pass

The second round of intersquad sevens was Friday, January 23. All teams showed improvement as they begin to build their chemistry and skill in the competition for the plate.

James Earl Jones 19 vs. Duderstadt 21

Jones started the game moving the ball well across the field. Matt Kasten gets a break inside and as he is tackled by his foot he is able to throw a falling one handed pass way out to the sideline to Dave Caputo. Caputo breaks to the Dudes’ 10 meter line, but Cooper Smart is able to stop him short with a shirt tackle. Zack Burns (Retro) picks the ball up off of the ruck, sheds a tackle and makes it to the corner of the try zone. Conversion by Retro Burns no good, Jones leads (5-0). Later Retro Burns was able to pick up the ball off of a bobbled switch by The Dudes and makes a signature one handed over head pass to Ben Clemens while getting doubled tackled. Clemens see Caputo out on the wing with open field in front of him and passes. Sadly it was a forward pass and Jones got called back on a penalty for what could have been an easy try. However Jones is able to win back the scrum and Retro Burns kicks it out of their own half. Cooper Smart recovers the ball at his own 10 meter line and attempts a counter kick, but it was botched and the kick only went out at the 23 meter line. Fortunately The Dudes get a penalty off of a poor lineout throw and maintain possession for the next minute and half with constant ball movement, going into contact only a few times until Nate (Fish) Fisher is able to get the ball at half and break through the defense with only 30 seconds remaining on the clock for the first half. Conversion by Andre Cargill is good, Dudes lead (5-7).

Jones wanted to set the tone and scored very early in the second half off of a kickoff. Retro Burns catches the kickoff and passes to Ian Charpie in the middle who goes into contact. Matt Kasten picks the ball and goes left, steps right, then left again to fake out two Dudes defenders and race 50 meters to the try line. Converstion by Kat Masten is good, Jones take the lead back (12-7). The Dudes waste no time with a response. On the following kickoff, Guy (Buddy / Pal / Friend) Burke catches the pall, passes into the middle to Cooper Smart, who passes to Andre Cargill. Andre slips between Kat Masten and Retro Burns. Kasten, being tired from his long run just seconds earlier, could not keep pace and Retro was right on Andre’s heels, but Andre is able to just get the ball over the line as he is double tackled by Retro Burns and Matias Ferro. Conversion by Andre is good, Dudes back in the lead (14-12). Jones gets the ball back from the kick and maintain possession, but with a few blunders and communication errors. Jones works marches down to The Dudes’ 30 yard line before Jesse Fenno poaches the ball with ferocityl. Sadly, 2 passes later Retro Burns intercepts a pass and jogs into the try zone with ease. Conversion by Retro is good, Jones now leads (14-19). The final try of the game came in the last minute for The Dudes. Cooper Smart strips the ball from Alex (mud) Hummel at Jones’ 5 meter line and goes down. Andre Cargill does a pick and go off the ruck to run around the defense and score another last second try to win the game. Dudes are victorious (21-19)

Ross 35 vs. Canham 7 

Freshman Meng (Bang Meng) Shi shows his skill as a new player to sevens and makes a huge run for Ross off of a lineout at Ross’ own 30 meter line. Bang Meng gets the ball on the edge from a pass from Joel Conzelmann, Meng steps around the outside defender and makes a break. Zack Burns Jr. catches him after a 30 meter chase, but Bang Meng sheds that tackle too like it was but a mere child trying to bring him down. Finally, Jordan (Violent J) Ulmer steps in front of Bang Meng at the 15 meter line and brings him down. After several phases of play without much gain or loss in territory, Jared (Boz) Bosma is able to make it through and score the try. Conversion by Conzelmann is good, Ross leads (7-0). Only a couple of minutes later Bang Meng brings the thunder once again as he makes a 90 meter run, slipping between 2 defenders and shedding a tackle at the halfway line before touching the ball down and putting more points up for Ross. Conversion by Conzelmann is good, Ross leads (14-0). Only a minute later Chening Duker is able to demonstrate once again why he is the king of the noodles, slipping effortlessly through Canham’s defense. He twists his body and flails his limbs in a manner that would make his ancestor, the wacky inflatable arm flailing tube man, proud before making a 40 meter run at the end of the half to score. Ross in the lead (21-0)

Ross shows no intentions of letting up the pressure in the second half. Only 30 seconds in, Boz whips a pass to Joel Conzelmann who is all alone on the wing. Joel is not phased though, and remembering he is a skilled player with a righteous life path, kicks a grubber at the 40 meter line to himself, which he does with ease. Joel runs into the middle of the try zone to score as sounds of “awwww” come from the sidelines as the UMRFC squad is disappointed to see that once again, Joel cannot fail and Ross continues to drive up points. Ross leads (28-0). Off of the kickoff, Canham gets a penalty for a kick that failed to go 10 meters from Ross. From this, Drew (Disco) Vecchio makes a run, offloads to his fellow big man Violent J Ulmer, who offloads it back to Disco Drew, and before Drew gets taken down at the 10 meter line he throws it back to Justin (Mouse) Malin, who could have passed it to Jeremy (Dozer) Reid for what would have surely been a try, but takes it into contact instead only 5 meters out. No matter though, after a few phases Albert Foo fakes out a defender with his low center of gravity and open up a gap in the defense just big enough for him to slip through and dives to score the try. Conversion by Disco Drew is good, Ross still leads (28-7). With 2 minutes remaining Chening Duker puts the final nail in the coffin of this game. Chening rips the ball from Disco Drew Vecchio’s arm right as it looked as though Canham had momentum to score again, and sprints all the way down the field with noodle speed to score for Ross. Conversion by Conzelmann is good, Ross wins 35-7

Oosterbaan 0 vs. Mary Sue 41

After last weeks double loss, Mary Sue came back with a dominating performance showcasing their speed and strength from old and new players alike. After the kickoff by Oosterbaan, Mary Sues bobble an easy pass for a knock on for  an early scrum deep in their own territory one minute into the game, giving Oosterbaan the opportunity for an early lead. Tohy Rakatovololona and Jeremy Parks had a battle of scrum halfs for a ball that quickly popped out of and back into the scrum almost as ugly as the pink shirt worn by the sir Brandon Sparks, Oosterban give the Mary Sues a penalty for playing on the ground. Tohy sees that nobody is covering the weak side, and does a quick tap and go to burn down the sideline for 70 meters and a try, making it all look Toheezy. Conversion by Tohy no good, Mary Sues lead (0-5). On the following kickoff, the ball gets batted out of the hands of an Oosterbaan player by Sequoyah Combes. Oosterbaan tries to recover the bouncing ball, but Sequoyah demonstrates his strength, speed, and ferocity as he snatches the ball off the bounce and gets 5 more points for the “Sue Krew”, as they call themselves. Conversion by Tohy is good, Sues lead (0-12). With 3 minutes left in the first half, the Sue Krew gets a scrum on Oosterbaan’s 20 meter line. The ball comes out the back of the much better looking scrum to Tohy, but Jeremy Parks over-pursued Tohy, and he was able to step around Parks and go weakside again to sprint for the try zone. Conversion by Tohy is no good, Mary Sue ahead (0-17). 1:30 is left in the first half but the Mary Sues refuse to stop the domination. Sequoyah Combes one again displays his athleticism as he runs from the center of the 30 meter line to burn around the right wing of the field and touch the ball down in the corner. Conversion by Tohy is good, Sues rack up more points (0-24). Oosterbaan tries to get some points on the board with one minute left in the first half, but make it harder on themselves with constant sideways running and poor passing relationship. With only 30 seconds remaining, Sequoyah Combes gets a well deserved yellow card for not wrapping up after he absolutely decks Jeremy Parks with his shoulder two steps after Parks had already passed it. Sequoyah gets to hang out in the sin bin for 2 minutes. With the one man advantage, Oostebaan tries to do a quick tap and go off of the penalty, but the ball bounces out of bounds and the first half ends.

Oosterbaan receives the kickoff in the first half with Sequoyah still out for a minute and a half. Ron Marine is able to make a pass out wide to a couple of fresh players, who have an open sideline and two men, but sadly squander the opportunity by pausing and passing the ball to early, allowing Mary Sue’s defense to quickly adjust and force the ball back to the middle of the field. After the sir in the garish pink shirt makes a poor knock on call after a bobbled pass to Ron Marine goes backwards off of Ron’s own foot, Mary Sue gets a scrum. The ball goes out to Tohy, who uses his nasty steps (as usual) to draw the defense in to him before he passes it to Juan Aguirre on the wing. Juan makes a break on the outside, and cuts back in before passing back to Tohy just 10 meters from the try line, but the ball is knocked on. NO MATTER! Mary Sue wins back the scrum and the fleet footed friends Tohy and Juan do it once again. Tohy gets the ball off of the scrum, runs to the weak side where he draws the only defender before dishing it to Juan to makes an easy 10 meter run into the try zone. Conversion by Tohy no good, Sequoyah comes back on and Mary Sues lead (0-29). Mary Sues get their following kickoff back after it goes 10 meters and bounces off of the ceiling, and only one phase later Tohy points Sequoyah to a gap, Tohy offloads to the fresh legged Sequoyah who makes an easy peezy 50 meter break to score. Conversion by Tohy is good, Mary Sues up (0-36). Mary Sues kick off right into the hands of Tomer Chen, who runs right through the defensive line and only Tohy stands between him and the try zone. Tomer tries to step Tohy but Tohy gets him by the legs, ending up with Tomer’s shoe in his hands in the process. Tohy shows us some british sportsman ship as he flings the shoe toward the sideline like no one would notice rather than dropping it next to the player he has just tackled. The sideline reacts with jeers. Mary Sues get a diving over penalty and Oosterbaan goes for a quick tap and go, overloading the left side. It looked as though Oosterbaan had a sure chance two score with no one guarding the last man on the outside 20 meters from the try line, but Ron Marine tries to take it in himself rather than distribute and Tohy makes a saving tackle, but it is high so Oosterbaan has penalty 5 meters out. Oosterbaan unfortunately keeps turning the ball over so close to the try zone, but fortunately for them the Mary Sues keep getting penalties giving Oosterbaan way too many opportunities. But right as the 7 minutes of the second half are up, Mary Sue gets the ball back and Juan Aguirre is able to make a 70 meter run to put some final points up. Nobody decides to kick the conversion for some reason, Mary Sue wins (0-41)

(this video also contains the first half of the next game, Jones vs Ross)

Jones 7 vs. Ross 14

This was a very tight and exciting game, the crowds were eager to see Ross get taken down by Jones and it almost happened, but sadly it was not in the cards. Zack Burns (Retro) gets a pass off of a turnover in his own end. He  does all the things you are not supposed to in sevens rugby, then scores, somehow…again. Here’s how it went down. Retros Burns cuts 30 meters across the field while only advancing 5 meter, ball in one hand, and slips through the line of defense waving the ball around above his head. Jared (Boz) Bosma the sweeper tries to cut him off, but this time Retros Burns waves the ball around above his foot, feigning a kick. Confused while the ball is not above his head, Boz gets faked out and Retros Burns makes it 50 meters to the corner of the try zone. Once again whoops and hollers can be heard from the sideline as fans/players are confused how Retro Burns can exist the way he does. Retro Burns converts, Jones lead Ross (7-0). Ross showed off the kick off that much like the Wu-Tang Clan, they aint nothin to [mess] with. Joel Conzelmann makes a break right through Jones’ defense when he stepped Retro Burns. Matias Ferro takes the angle to try and stop him, but Joel introduces Ferro’s chest to his stiff arm and puts him on the ground, loud whoops come from the sideline. However Ferro’s efforts were enough to slow Joel down and let him get caught from behind by other Jones defenders 20 meters out. It looked as though Ross had it in the bag, but Ross gets a playing on the ground penalty in the next phase and squander their opportunity for a quick bounce back and Jones gets the scrum. Just before the end of the first half, Ross gets a penalty on their own 30 meter line. Ross moves it all the way across the field to Bang Meng Shi. He fakes out the edge defender by stepping in, the quickly juking back out to give him a clear 50 meter break to the try zone as the first half ends. Conzelmann kicks the conversion, the game is all tied up at the end of the first half (7-7).

The second half went back and forth between both teams, it was very evenly matched with opportunities emerging for both. 4 minutes in, Alex (mud) Hummel is able to get a huge break starting from his own 30 meter line for 50 meters. Just before he gets tackled by the last defender, he makes a pass to Nick (Crawdad) Mattes on the sideline who would have had an easy try to put Jones in the lead, but he unfortunately knocks it on. With a minute and a half remaining, Ross capitalizes on the turnover and Chening Duker makes a break through Jones’ defense for 70 meters to score. Joel’s conversion is good. Ross, to the chagrin of everyone except Ross themselves, takes the lead (7-14). The clock runs out of time before Jones has an opportunity to redeem themselves, Ross takes the victory (7-14).

(the following is the second half footage, the first half and beginning for the second half can be found in the video above)

Canham 38 Vs. Oosterbaan 5

Canham scores 1 minute in as Oosterbaan backs themselves into a corner with poor depth and passing to people who are flat footed or standing right next to them. Off of a turnover at Oosterbaan’s own 10 Jordan (Violent J) Ulmer all but walked into the try zone. Kick by Disco Drew Vecchio is good, Canham leads (7-0). Canham scores once again only a little over a minute later off of a turnover by Oosterbaan. The ball gets to Disco Drew, who uses his 6’4″ figure and tree trunk-esque legs to tie up several defenders before offloading to Albert Foo, who makes a huge 50 meter break after slipping through three defenders. Just as Foo reaches the 5 meter line, Ben Costarelis uses his superior leg length to catch Foo and stop him. Foo makes a pass up to Justin (Mouse) Malin who is support and Mouse finishes the try with ease. Kick by Disco Drew is no good, Canham leads (12-0). Canham kicksoff and the ball tumbles out of bounds at Oosterbaan’s 15 meter line. Lineout to Oosterbaan. Disco Drew is the only man in the lineout for Canham, but somehow still manages to beat Oosterban’s lift and intercept the ball, taking 5 easy strides untouched for another Canham try. Disco’s kick doesnt make it, Canham up (17-0). Canham is able to make some good ball movement for the remainder of the first half, but nothing comes up it. First half ends with Canham leading (17-0).

Canham goes a good job of moving the ball and exploiting opportunities when they are open to move the ball downfield in the beginning of the first half, but lose the ball a couple of times when they were less than 20 meters from finishing. Three and half minutes into the second half, Canham gets a scrum 20 meters from the try line and the ball goes to Mouse Malin, who slips through the defense but gets tackled from behind just inches from the try line. Disco Drew is able to easily pick the ball up and touch it down in the middle. Conversion by Disco is good, Canham leads (24-0). Oosterbaan responds with a try of their own only a minute later, as they overload one side of the field and Brian (Pablo) Chu gets the ball with nobody in front of him, making a break for 50 meters and touching the ball down with his muscled and tattooed Malaysian arms. Kick by Ron Marine no good, Oosterbaan trails (24-5). Canham responds to the response right off of the kickoff again. The ball goes through several hands before going to Foo in the middle. Foo does his little jukey-jukes and uses his low center of gravity to step around the looming Ben Costarelis and make a break for 60 meters all the way down the middle to score. Kick by Disco is good, Canham showing no mercy (31-5). The final try came from a flawless line out by Canham, followed by good passing which put Jeremy Reed in the try zone just as time ran out. The conversion is good and Canham is victorious (38-5).

Mary Sue 22 vs. Duderstadt 7

This was a well fought and evenly matched game with only one try scored in the first half, but the Sue Krew was able to run away with it in the second half. Sadly there was no film for this game and because I had to play for The Dudes this match, I gave my computer to an injured freshman (who shall remain unnamed) who was not playing to take notes. The following is abridged and annotated version of what he typed down.

lineout sue wins.
Audrey (Andre Cargill) is a little [redacted]
Copes (Cooper Smart) make amazing behind the back pass, knock (Jesse) Fenno
scrum to Sue Cru, Sue wins
Sequoia (Sequoyah) proceeds to be a beast. Meanwhile Juan is a speed demon, but fails to score.
fish (Nate Fisher) is slippery. like a fish
adder (I don’t know who adder is) kicks the ball. New Wave (an Olde Boy on the sideline) proclaims this is not soccer. audrey (Cargill) misses the return in shame
juan burns grass. chief (Sequoyah Combes) scores. 5-0 sue
scrum to Dudes. Dudes win, making a deep, penetrating drive. turnover chief (Sequoyah)
scrum to Dudes after a promising run by sue
audrey (Cargill) makes a dumb pass.
sue kick for touch, ending the half.

1/2 time

tohy fast toooeeee so fast. 2E score. 10-0 SUE
travis makes a fantastic drive after a subpar pass from audrey (Cargill)
Fenno finishes for a try. Dudes [description of reaction redacted]. 10-7
buddy (Guy Burke) pass to his pal (this could be anybody). juan makes an interception
chief (Sequoyah) tries. 17-7 Süe
copes (Cooper Smart) is a trickster god. offloads to audrey. Audrey (Cargill) smash.
tohy so fast he make more score 22-7 sue krew

Standings