The third week of our winter intrasquad sevens season commenced last Friday, January 27th 2017. This week brought some intense games and big upsets to the sevens standings. The good news: Canham may be a little more humble this week. The bad news: our stars on Bennie Oosterbaan struggled all day. Unfortunately, I couldn’t be in attendance on Friday (and look how Bennie did, coincidence?) but don’t worry, the write-up will be up to its usual questionable standard. Enjoy.
Game 1: Bennie 14 – Jones 17
Obviously this was a heartbreaker for the many fans of Bennie Oosterbaan. Keep in mind that Bennie once again is in short supply of players (partially my own fault for not being there) and needed two subs from other teams to start the game. Bennie actually led the scoring with a good drive down the field ending in a try by Jason “Caveman” Anthony. Shortly after the resulting kickoff, Oosterbaan’s own Max “Johnny Bravo” Cocco got violently tackled by Lee “tenacious D” Moore. Max’s ankle was badly injured and the number of actual Bennie’s on the field dropped to four. Shortly after that, Jones’s own Maxime Meijers managed to break the line and was running down the field when Juan “I supposedly have never played a contact sport before” Marco delivered a vicious try-saving tackle. Bennie gained possession of the ball off of a later scrum and began moving the ball down the field. The dangerous Ryan “Madden” Hart got the ball on the edge and broke an obscene amount of tackles while juking his way to the try zone for the score. At this point in the game things looked pretty good for Bennie, two tries to none and they even made the conversions. To start the second half, Bennie made a good positive drive towards the opposite try zone. Bennie got the ball to Matt “lowkey wheels” Patzer on the edge who had a great run down the line. Unfortunately, Jones was able to knock the ball loose from the ruck with some questionable at best playing on the ground. This resulted in David “Bawston” Caputo running down the field until he was caught by Ryan “Madden” Hart who made a great tackle from behind to strip the ball. Of course, Bennie couldn’t catch a break and the sir called Madden on a high tackle. To worsen things, a few plays later Bennie’s Ron “get low” Marine was given a yellow card for a high tackle. Some questionable attack phases and some great individual effort from Lee Moore later, and Nick “Crawdad” Mattes put down a try for the Jones. Bennie botched the resulting kick return, but Ryan Hart got the ball to the edge and sprinted down the field. Shockingly, Maxime Meijers was able to catch up to Ryan and bring him down. This put Bennie’s defense in a terrible position and Crawdad once again ran the ball into the try zone. The game that started off so well for Bennie was quickly getting out of their hands. On the resulting kickoff, a not releasing penalty against Bennie allowed Will “Wig Kemo Cleano foreano” Biel to put in a score that put Jones in the lead for the first time all game. Bennie was unable to respond despite great individual effort from Ron “Wawa” Marine. It would seem Bennie has found the ideal number of towers to have on their team, and when that number isn’t there, neither are the wins.
Game 2: Canham 22 – Sues 10
Those of you who read the intro (so just me) know that I said Canham would see a bit of humbling this week. Don’t worry, that’s coming. One might argue that it was even better that their ego was given one more game to rise before everything came tumbling down. Either way, the dark side prevailed once more this game. It was actually the Sues who led off the scoring with Tohy “for the crown” Rakotovololona setting up a long run and a try for Alekos “baklava” Askounis. The next few minutes saw some great rugby from both teams. After a good drive from Canham, Tanner “wiz widdout” Visco is able to put five points on the board for Canham. If you watch the film at this point, be sure to notice Jamie “Cha Cha” Demers aggressively calling for a sub as he walks to the sidelines. Maybe Cha Cha wasn’t calling for a sub, because he was in game for the next kickoff, which he cleanly fielded and almost led to another great Tohy to Alekos “spanakopita” Askounis try. Unfortunately for everyone (besides Canham), the ball ended up out of bounds. Shortly after this, Albert “teddy bear” Foo, who had honestly been running circles around people all game up to this point, ran around a few more kids to set Jeremy “Dozer” Reid up with a try to end the half. Canham started the next half off well with a try from Zachary “Junior” Burns. The very next kickoff was expertly fielded by Burns again who took a leaf from his counterpart’s (Zachary “not Junior” Burns) book and used a great dummy to create space and bring the ball in for another try. Impressively, no one but Junior touched the ball after it left the kickers foot. Unfortunately, for reasons I couldn’t discern, the sir called back the try, but it was still an impressive play. After some more gameplay and a few more calls against Canham, the Sues scored again with the help of Dean “gym is life” Persichetti. The next score came shortly after with a nice grubber kick from Tanner “flower boy” Visco who fielded his own kick and dotted in the try for Canham. The Sues were unable to respond with more scores and Canham got one last ego boost before their glorious defeat.
Game 3: Ross 10 – Dudes 33
There’s no question that the Dudes were hot on Friday. This was already going to be a tough matchup for Ross, but when the Dudes start going on a tear, there’s not much that can stop them (besides, arguably, a healthy Bennie squad). Ross started off the game with a good drive, but Andre Cargill drew a not releasing penalty. The Dudes used the resulting penalty kick to get the ball to Andre again who set up Tim Telford for the try. The resulting kickoff was a mad scramble for the ball that ended up with Andre kicking the ball out of bounds. The Dudes were able to win the ball off of the lineout and Kyle Patmore set up Andre for another try for the Dudes. Ross responded with a nice run from Meng who then offloaded to the recurring theme in these posts, John “(insert something about how fast I am here)” Spooney who took it in for the try. After a minute or so of back and forth play, freshman Kyle Patmore broke the line and ran for a good 70+ yards to score the try for the Dudes and close out the half. Ross kicked to start the half and Andre made a great play to field the kick and carry the Dudes momentum down the field. Fortunately for Ross, they were able to force a turnover and began to drive in the opposite direction. Unfortunately for Ross, a great run by Meng led to a questionable offload that bounced off a few Ross player’s hands before being fielded by Kyle Patmore who ran it down the field and offloaded to Nate “Fish” Fisher who made the smart play of staying in support. Fish put down another try for the Dudes. Ross was getting tired of not scoring, and on the next kickoff, you guessed it, John Spooney fielded the ball and ran all the way to the try zone as if there were no defenders on the field. Five points to Ross. After some solid back and forth play, no one is able to score until Jared Char gets the ball on the edge and bolts down the field to score a try for the Dudes. Ross showed some great effort and tenacity in the final minutes of the game, but were unable to score another try before the game ended.
Game 4: Sues 15 – Bennie 14
I think it’s pretty evident that I’m going to take issue with this game. Keep in mind that Bennie was down to only four (four!) healthy players at this point. All other players were subs from other teams. Things didn’t start off well for Bennie. Tohy Rakotovololona scored a try for the Sues in the first 40 seconds of the game. Some time later, Davis Grimm had a great run down the field until he was caught by Tohy, whose tackle allowed Alekos “koulourakia” Askounis to poach the ball and begin running towards the opposite try zone. Luckily for Bennie, Colin Walters was there to make the tackle. The Sues swung it wide to Jamie “265” Demers who picked up steam and ran hard into the young (and not necessarily sizable) Juan Marco. Marco executed an utterly impressive tackle and threw Jamie to the ground. Some great dynamic play from Ron Marine and Ryan Hart led to what looked like a sure try for Hart until the sir blew the whistle and called a forward pass (questionable of course). To make matters worse for Bennie, the Sues got the ball to Dean Persichetti who went on a long run and broke a few tackles, heading towards what seemed like a sure try. Then, right as he went to touch the ball down, Juan “my man” Marco came out of nowhere and made a great try saving tackle. I can see Coach saying it now: “that’s why you don’t give up on a play.” Unfortunately, the Sues got the ball to Tohy off of the resulting scrum, and he put a try down for the Sues to end the half. Bennie started off the half well with a great run from Lee Moore after he fielded the kickoff, but it was not to last. Some sloppy play led to a turnover and a big run by Jake (Jesse?) Bailey who offloaded it to Jamie Demers who did a good job following in support. Jamie put another five on the board for the Sues. Or so it seemed! But once again, the young legend Juan “legendé” Marco flew in to make a try saving tackle! Many minutes of some questionable rugby later, the Sues were able to get the ball to Dean “not this time” Persichetti on the edge, who ran the ball in for a try. Bennie refused to give up and they managed to put another try into the try zone with the help of a nice run from Justin Malin. The conversion was good, making this a one point game in favor of the Sues. Alas, that is how the game stayed. Tough loss for Bennie here. Not our day. But soon, soon it will be our day.
Game 5: Jones 17 – Ross 10
These two teams actually met up in week two and saw very different results. Jones was hungry for revenge from their previous loss. After over two minutes of some scrambled rugby, Meng Shi managed to strip the ball out of the arms of an opposing player. He fielded the ball from the ground cleanly and ran it into the try zone. Five points to Ross. Jones responded with some well put together phases that took them to about the 15 yard line. They managed to score a few more phases after a lineout. David Caputo scored the try. The kickoff after the try was a long one, and Ross appeared to be in some trouble until Meng got the ball and ran almost 80 yards before offloading to who but John Spooney who jotted down five points for Ross. The kickoff after the try went straight out of bounds and this ended the half. Ross started off the second half with wolverinelike tenacity and managed to get the ball all the way to around the two yard line before being penalized. In a wild turn of events, Nick Mattes took the penalty kick tap and go and offloaded to Maxime Meijers who ran forward, broke a tackle and offloaded to Lee Moore. Lee shot off a long pass to Mattes, who ran a great switch with David Caputo who took it to the house for five points to Jones. After a quick few phases post-kickoff, Davis Grimm put another try in to solidify the victory for Jones. Jones got their revenge.
Game 6: Canham 7 – Dudes 26
Finally. The game we’ve all been waiting for. Sorry Canham, not today. What we have here is a tale of great triumph over the forces of bigheadedness. Not only did the vainglorious forces fall, but they were held to a single try! Let us begin the story of the dismantling of Canned Ham (or whatever it is). The first three minutes of the game started completely scoreless. Finally, the scoreless streak was broken, but not, surprisingly, by the Dudes. A pass from Connor “Fridge” Jones meant for Andre Cargill was intercepted by the freshman Tanner Visco who ran it back to score five points for Canham. The conversion was kicked by Justin Malin, 7 – 0 Canham. And that’s it ladies and gentleman. That was the last score by Canham for the entire game. So sit back and prepare for some humbling. Later in the game, the Dudes were penalized for a knock on, so there was a scrum to Canham. This is when the forward pack of the Dudes came together and dominated the scrum, allowing the Dudes to recover the ball. After some dynamic lines run by Tohy, Andre, and Fish, little progress was being made. Andre caught an offload from Fish (Nate Fisher) near the sideline and he saw nowhere to go so he demonstrated his passing skills and threw it across the field to Guy Burke. Guy quickly and skillfully transitioned the ball and passed to Jared Char on the opposite side of the field. A completely unprepared Canham defensive line was mercilessly exploited for the try by Char to end the half. The next half was Dudes domination. Their defensive structure at the beginning of the half was among the best all season. Players were identifying their man and pushing to the edge perfectly. The result? The Cocky Canham Congregation had nowhere to go. Canham eventually knocked the ball on, creating a turnover. The Dudes quickly got the ball from the scrum and it eventually ended up in the hands of Tohy “questionably fair sub” Rakotovololona who passed the ball long to Andre, who quickly got the ball to Jared Char on the sideline. Char promptly took off down the sideline and ran 80 yards to score the try for the Dudes. On the resulting kickoff, the Dudes gained possession quickly and after a series of well run switches and unders lines, Fish broke the defensive line and scored another try for the Dudes. To make matters worse for Canham (so, better for the general populous), on that same play, Justin Malin was given a yellow card for a high tackle. Even I will admit that the yellow card seemed excessive, the tackle didn’t look high on the film to me. But, it’s Canham, so I’m not arguing. The last try of the game came from Alex Carson, who trucked a defender, rolled (apparently showed release), and got to his feet to score the try. Wig Biel was unfortunately injured on the play attempting to stop Carson from scoring the try. But there you have it. Canham goes down in flames. They’ll be lucky to make the playoffs at this point if you ask me. Their morale must be shattered. I wouldn’t be surprised if they all quit the team that night. Regardless, another great week of rugby came to a close.
